Trying not to be Cynical

Alex hasn't asked to call Ukraine for a while, so two nights ago  I suggested that he call. I don't know if I should have, but I figured I should offer. He called his Grandma, who just spent 30 minutes crying and talking. We have discovered that calling through Skype is the cheapest way to call, so I could hear her. She just monopolized the conversation. He was just placating her and when he got off the phone, he told me that she needed money for medicine and hospital bills. He also told me that she had not had enough money recently to pay for the upkeep on his dad's grave. I wonder how she blew through all the money we gave her when we left Ukraine 2 months ago.

Anyway, he was very reluctant to ask me for money for her, but I could tell he felt obligated to do so. I was so mad, this is a burden that he should not have to bear. I was also mad at her - she really didn't give him a chance to talk about his life here. She didn't give him a chance to tell her if he was ok! So this is where my cynicalness is coming out. I should be more charitable, but it is hard - I think the first priority on all our lives should be Alex!

But, I tried to put aside all these feelings and feel more understanding of her situation. Thank goodness the Morfords are going over to Ukraine. (Thank you Alisa and Marsh!) I rushed around yesterday, withdrawing money, and having Alex write a letter, so that they could hand deliver some money to her. I don't know how we will support her once we do not have anyone going over there. I do not feel comfortable sending cash in the mail and I do not think she has a bank account, but maybe this won't be a problem - I am not going to suggest Alex call her again. If he wants to - fine, but I am not going to push it.

After the conversation about his grandmother ended, he looked so pitiful. I tucked him in bed and tried to say goodnight, but he just clung to me and didn't want to let go. He wanted me to stroke his hair until he fell asleep, so I gladly did. My heart was breaking as I looked down at him. He is such a little boy at heart and just needs so much love - I hope I am up to this task that has been set before me.