I have made a tough decision, but I think that I will end the letters part of my blog here. I will continue to blog, but now it is more for the audience than for Alex. I am finishing up his book of letters with a sappy one, just for him and me!
So, to update everyone on our first few days at home.... We slept like the dead that first night, but woke up refreshed and ready to tackle the day. Alex was happy and bouncy that first morning. He, Amanda, and G4, spent the morning playing video games. We were a little bummed - G3 was out of town at a business meeting in Chicago, so we felt a little incomplete. The boys tried to go bike riding, but the bikes have sat in the garage for so long, they needed a tune up. So I loaded them in the back of my van and took off with Alex in tow. Alex has grown since he was here last year so we are going to have to get a new bike at some point, but we are feeling a little poor after all the expense layouts from adoption, so we are going to put off that purchase for a while. We have other bikes (allbeit girl’s bikes).
Then he wanted some sports equipment, so off to Big 5 Sports to get those and then we stopped by the bank that had helped me get all of the money for the trip together. The women at the bank were all giggling over him and gawking at him, I think he was a little embarrassed.
We finally got home and he played around with the kids all afternoon. Victoria came over to translate for me, but it turned out to be more of a fun visit than a necessary translation visit. She and he chatted for a while about inconsequential things and when she asked him how he was and if he needed anything, he said he was happy and didn’t need anything.
G3 got home about 9:00 that night, so it was nice to all be together. G3 sat down with Alex and laid out our strategy on calling to Ukraine. We are going to allow him a 25 minute once a week allowance to call his girlfriend and Grandma (hmmmm - let’s think how he is going to divide that - 1 minute to Grandma and 24 to girlfriend!) If he wants more, he will have to earn it. So, we let him have a freebie and call his girlfriend anyway - and guess what - he spent all 25 minutes on his girlfriend.
Then both boys got a lesson in shaving with a straight razor (G4 had been using an electric one that crapped out - so now onto the straight razor). Poor Alex really needed it - he looked like ZZ Top almost. He was so excited that before bed, he rushed off to shave! And that brings up an interesting point, about showers. In the three days he has been here, he has showered 5 times. Maybe there wasn’t a chance to shower much at the orphanage, but he is making up for it here.
Today, he didn’t wake up until 1:10 pm. I was concerned that I needed to check for the development of bed sores. I was at the Tae Kwon Do studio with Amanda when he woke up, but my mom called me and told me he was up and mentioned that he looked a little lost without me. I came home shortly thereafter, and when I walked in, he jumped up and gave me a big, crushing hug. He must still have a little anxiety that I might not always be there.
His room had been a pigsty with all of the suitcase spread around, but on his own, he cleaned it up today. I was proud of him, I didn’t even have to ask him. Then he got ready and I took the three kids into G3’s office. I was a little worried about that. A lot of people at his work had been asking about Alex, but I am very concerned about him feeling like he is being shown off and paraded around. So I suggested that we take the kids to the breakroom where there was a pool table, a pingpong table, and a Playstation. Then G3 told everyone Alex was there, so they could come in to meet him. I think that was far less threatening for him.
He was playing with G4 and Amanda while G3 and I were able to visit. It was a lot of fun. However, I did notice that every few minutes he looked around for me and wanted to make eye contact with me. He needs constant reassurance that I am still there and available for him. It was so sweet. I realized how strong our bond was, and I need to make sure that this bond grows with everyone in the family.
Afterwards we went to the AT&T to get his iPhone activated. Since we do not have a home phone, everyone needs a phone to be able to communicate. He was excited and started calling all of us immediately. He will rapidly be filling up his contacts with friends, I am sure!
So, to wrap up, I can only say that Alex is a delight in every respect. He is still my ‘bad boy’. He wants to drive my car, he sneaks up on me and scares me all the time, he plays his music too loud - all the normal teenage boy things that they are prone to do. He is always smiling and happy and active. We are so happy to have him here and are so happy to share his delight in everything new. We are starting with working on family attachment things, like learning to sit at the dinner table until everyone finishes, etc. He is such a good kid, he observes a lot and many times we don’t even have to say anything. But when we do, he just follows along with what we want! He has been such a delight!
More updates later. Thanks for reading everyone.
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